My husband and best friend passed away 2 years ago on April 1. But I still can’t cross the bridge between my life with him and a new life without him on the other side of the bridge.

As I stand at the beginning of the bridge, he is still with me. I can visualize him standing behind me at the threshold of the bridge. I believe he would want me to cross the bridge but I can’t bring myself to leave him there standing alone.

I’m so afraid of losing him if I cross over the bridge. I don’t want to forget his laugh, his pranks, and his hugs when I cry.

Across the bridge is unknown territory. My friends and family tell me to cross the bridge and live, laugh, and maybe love again. My heart tells me that I know what is on this side of the bridge with the memories. I’m not sure I’m ready to live differently or to laugh and have joy in my life. I know I will never love again.